How to Practice Discipline when Negotiating in Commercial Real Estate
So much time in commercial real estate is spent hunting down the right deal. Studying submarkets, running underwriting models, and building relationships with brokers are all crucial pieces to making sure a deal works for both you and your client.
But money is either made or lost when you and the other party sit across the table and negotiate price and terms.
After nearly a decade of negotiating deals, I’ve found that the best strategy is to focus on patience and discipline. Knowing when to hold your position, when to slow down, and when to walk away entirely can take time to develop, but showing discipline guarantees you don’t leave any money on the table.
Here's what it looks like in practice.
Know your specific number before negotiations start
The worst time to figure out your price floor is when you're already sitting across from a buyer. By this point the relationship has been built and the deal has momentum, all of which work can work against logic and clear thinking. If you haven't decided in advance what you're willing to accept, you're making that decision under conditions that are designed to compromise your judgment.
Before negotiations begin, establish a specific figure below which the deal doesn't make sense for you. The market doesn't consider how much you want the deal to work, and conceding below your floor because the conversation got uncomfortable is how sellers leave significant money behind on transactions that should have gone differently.
Explore Your Alternatives Before You Need Them
Buyers consistently overpay when they've convinced themselves that a specific property is the only viable option. It's easy to arrive at this conclusion because you've spent months doing the work and you can start visualizing how the property will look and how it will be used.
If the seller starts to sense that you’re not considering other options, they begin to negotiate with an entirely different posture.
The solution isn't to manufacture leverage artificially or misrepresent your position, but it’s important to have a back up plan if the main property you’re chasing doesn’t work out. Pursuing multiple properties simultaneously, maintaining active relationships with brokers, and staying engaged with the market even when you're deep in a deal keeps you in a position where walking away from one opportunity doesn't mean starting from scratch.
That optionality changes both how you negotiate and how the other side negotiates with you.
React Slowly and Intentionally
When the other side makes an unexpected move like a counteroffer that comes in far from where you expected, or a deadline that suddenly appears, it might feel like the natural instinct is to respond immediately. But I’ve found that it’s always better to slow down and make a calculated decision rather than react impulsively.
A deliberate pause accomplishes two things: 1) it signals confidence because someone who needs the deal more than they're willing to lose it responds quickly out of fear and 2) you have the time to think through the long-term effects of their change instead of reacting to the emotional weight of the moment.
Slow the conversation down and work through the implications before you commit to a position. If the other side is serious about getting the deal done they will almost always wait.
The Cost of Letting Urgency Replace Strategy
Over the past decade I've seen significant money left on the table because one side let urgency replace strategy at a critical moment. They reacted too quickly to a counteroffer, conceded a position they didn't need to, or agreed to terms that didn't reflect what the market actually supported.
Urgency in a negotiation is almost always manufactured and deadlines are typically softer than they're presented. When you feel pressure to move faster than your analysis supports, it's worth asking whose interests that timeline actually serves.
Discipline keeps you anchored to what the deal is actually worth and helps fight the distractions that can arise in a moment’s notice. It allows both sides to reach an outcome they're genuinely satisfied with rather than one that one party immediately regrets. In a business built on relationships and repeat transactions, the way you negotiate remains important long after the deal closes.
Matthew Antonis
Matthew Antonis is a leading figure in the DMV market, recognized for his specialized expertise in Industrial Property and unwavering dedication to client success. His career is defined by high-impact transactions and a data-driven approach that consistently sets new benchmarks in the region.
Matthew made his mark immediately with a monumental debut transaction: securing 161,792 square feet across 11.73 acres, encompassing 14 buildings for $15.2 million. This early success set the tone for a career characterized by lucrative deals and repeat clientele who trust his deep knowledge of the industrial sector.
